The anguish and worry that comes with umcertainty.  Something left unsaid leaves the thoughts of what, who, where, when and why?  Trying hard to not convey about the feelings that are really being felt in case the truth and reality is more or less is a first suspected.  Deception especially to yourself is hard, cruel and unkind and twists the concept of the mind. The only outcome will be torture and pain just like blunt knives hacking away at the exposed flesh creating weaping wounds that never heal. When will this all end? ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!

So many twist and turns, Ups and downs, going round never knowing whats around the next corner!  Somewhere out there hope is on the horizon ..... it seems so far away in the distance. A thought, a wish come what may tomorrow is yet another day! Beyond these walls behind closed doors climbing up steep hills the curtain of truth opens destiny prevails!  Don't give up just yet the voice screams perseverance and patients will eventually see you through so hold on tight! As rough as it may seem at the time the results will be worth it all in the end.  Trust your instincts as they are rarely wrong.  THIS TIME WILL PASS. You know who you are and I hope you understand this message. 

A lot has happened over the past 6 months.  I have been pre-occupied with home and family issues most are still ongoing.  Life goes on regardless!  I have also had a very busy social life with partys and such like! This year so far I have been to 2 hen nights, 2 weddings, 2 18ths birthdays, an 80th birtday, seen a local amiture show, a 50th birthday, a 60th birthday, a Bon Jovi concert, been on 2 holidays, visited castles, travelled the countryside and so on!  Going to another Wedding on 13th September my best friend is gettting married for the second time!  I have a new man in my life, in fact I met him at one of the partys above!  Just taking one day at a time.  I am having a birthday party myself next week. Its a fancy dress masquerade ball. I am planning to be the belle of the ball or even be cinderella and have a prince charming by my side! Will update another time when i find some time to do so!

The past 6 months have been a rollercoaster of events and emotions......... At one point I thought I was going to lose my house, my kids and my job. So much was happening in a very short period of time, all the things that mattered the most were concentrated and very intense to breaking point! Not only that but having to cope day to day making important decisions alone with no back up or safety net learning to face the consequences of my own actions. Whatever choices I made affected not just myself but my imediate family. However it is far from over there is still a long way to go before lots of loose ends can be tied up but life is like that and I intend to enjoy riding the rollercoaster of life holding on tight to the highs and freefalling with the lows.